validation

When You’re Your Best Self, Safety Starts Within Let me tell you about a little gem of wisdom I got from my coach today. Now, you already know my memory isn’t the best, but her words hit so hard that even I couldn’t forget them. She said, “When you’re the best version of yourself, you look within for your safety.” And y’all, when I tell you I needed to hear that? It was like a pressure release valve. Let me paint the scene for you: she started breaking it down, explaining why in those moments when I feel like I need external validation (you know, when you’re hoping someone will say, *“You did a great job!” or “You’re so amazing!”), what I really need is to sit still and care for myself. Oof. Which one of us hasn’t gotten tired of being our own cheerleader? Sometimes you just want someone else to wave a pom-pom or throw a little confetti for all the hard work you’re doing. And that’s normal—it’s human! But my coach hit me with the truth bomb: those moments when I’m craving external validation? That’s just my inner self waving her little flag, letting me know it’s time for me to love on me. Why This Hit Me So Hard Here’s the thing: when you’re on a journey to be your best self, it’s easy to get caught up in looking for outside approval. Whether it’s from a partner, a boss, or even your followers on social media, we all want that little nod that says, “You’re doing amazing, sweetie!” But here’s the problem—when you rely on others for that safety and validation, it’s like building a house on sand. If the applause stops or the compliments don’t come, what happens then? You’re left questioning yourself, and that’s no way to live. What my coach reminded me is that real safety—the kind that lasts—isn’t external. It’s internal. It comes from showing up for yourself, even when it feels hard, and being the kind of person who can say, “I see you. I love you. You’re doing great.” When Your Inner Self Calls, Answer Her The next time you catch yourself scrolling through your texts to see if someone acknowledged your efforts, or replaying a conversation hoping they’ll say you did a good job—pause. That’s your inner self whispering, “Hey, it’s me. I need you right now.” Here’s what you can do instead: When you do this, you’re telling yourself, “I’ve got you.” And let me tell you, that’s the most powerful thing you can ever say to yourself. The Beauty of Looking Within Being your best self isn’t about being perfect or never needing a little encouragement. It’s about knowing that at the end of the day, you can always return to you. When you’re able to look within for safety, love, and validation, the rest of the world becomes a bonus—not a requirement. So, the next time you feel like you need external validation, remember: it’s just your inner self asking for a little love. Show up for her. She’s been cheering for you all along. If this message resonates with you and you’re ready to deepen your self-love journey, join us at Chocolate Serenity. Through coaching, retreats, and community, we’re here to help you build a life rooted in joy, peace, and unwavering confidence. Your best self is waiting. Are you ready to meet her? And hey don’t keep this a secret, like, share, comment, follow. The only way we all grow is if we give each other a hand.