June 2024

The Power of Visualization Sometimes we all need a little boost to accomplish our goals. Whether its because you can’t seem to find the time or deep down you are just a little worried that it’s out of reach. One good way to get that boost is visualization. Let’s take a look at how you can use visualization to make your goals a reality. And don’t just trust me. Trust the science. The Science Behind Visualization Before we get into the nitty-gritty, let’s talk science. Visualization, or mental imagery, isn’t just wishful thinking. Research has shown that it can significantly impact our ability to achieve goals. Studies have found that mental practices, like visualization, can enhance motivation, increase confidence, and improve performance. One study published in the Journal of Applied Sport Psychology showed that athletes who used visualization techniques improved their performance more than those who didn’t. Another study in Psychology Today showed that our brains can’t distinguish between a real memory and an imagined one, which means visualizing success can trick your brain into thinking you’ve already achieved it, which then boosts your confidence and performance. Isn’t that great? So let’s talk about how. 1. Picture Your Paradise First things first: you need to vividly imagine your end goal. I mean really imagine it. Close your eyes, see the goal in technicolor. The more detailed, the better. Imagine the sights, sounds, the smells, who is there with you, how you feel. Get all of the details. Example: If your goal is to run a marathon, visualize crossing the finish line. Picture the crowd cheering, feel the burn in your legs, see the other runners, and imagine the sense of triumph washing over you. 2. Frame Your Focus Now that you’ve got that crystal-clear image in your head, it’s time to create a vision board. Yes, we’re going old school with this one. Cut out pictures, words, and anything that represents your goal. Stick them on a board and place it where you’ll see it every day. Personally I prefer to do it on my computer. I google the images, arrange them on a PowerPoint slide and save it as a JPEG. I can either print it and hang it or save it as the wall paper on my computer. I love the ease of it and there is no clean up after. Don’t judge me. Example: Want to buy a house? Fill your board with pictures of your dream home, keys, a happy family, and even mortgage papers with a big “PAID” stamp on them. 3. Daily Dose of Daydreams Make visualization a daily habit. Spend a few minutes each morning and night closing your eyes and seeing yourself achieving your goal. This primes your brain to stay focused and motivated. Example: If you’re aiming for a promotion, visualize yourself in that new office, handling your new responsibilities with ease, and getting congratulated by your colleagues. 4. Affirm with Attitude Combine your visualizations with positive affirmations. Speak them out loud with confidence and sass. Words have power, so use them to reinforce your vision. Example: If your goal is to get fit, say things like, “I am strong, I am unstoppable, and I am crushing my fitness goals!” while picturing yourself lifting those weights or running that extra mile. 5. Feel the Feels Visualization isn’t just about seeing; it’s about feeling. Emotions are a powerful driver. As you visualize, let yourself feel the joy, pride, and excitement as if you’ve already achieved your goal. Example: If you’re aiming to write a book, feel the weight of the finished manuscript in your hands, the excitement of signing a publishing deal, and the pride of seeing your book on a store shelf. 6. Action, Action, Action Visualization without action is just a daydream. Take consistent steps towards your goal. Use your visualizations as motivation to keep moving forward, especially when things get tough. Example: If your goal is to travel the world, start by saving money, researching destinations, and planning your itinerary. Visualize each step to keep yourself motivated and on track. 7. Adjust and Adapt Sometimes goals shift, and that’s okay. Revisit and tweak your visualizations as needed. Stay flexible and adapt your vision to match your evolving dreams. Example: If your career goal changes from climbing the corporate ladder to starting your own business, update your vision board, daily visualizations, and affirmations to reflect this new direction. I update mine every quarter. 8. Celebrate Your Wins Finally, celebrate your achievements, big or small. Recognize your progress and reward yourself. This reinforces the positive behavior and keeps the momentum going. Example: If your goal was to complete a project, celebrate when you reach milestones. Treat yourself to something special. I love to celebrate even the small wins with treats. Maybe I just love treats. So there you have it. Visualization isn’t just some woo-woo concept; it’s a practical, powerful tool to help you crush your goals. I have used it myself to accomplish my goals – which is why I have to update my vision board every quarter. So give it a try, see it, believe it, and achieve it. Your goals become more attainable when you visualize them. At one point Chocolate Serenity was just a name on my vision board. Now I have clients. Yay! If you like this post, please like it, share it, subscribe, and follow us on Instagram.

Climbing the Pyramid: How Mental Fitness Elevates Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs Welcome, fellow climbers of life’s pyramid! Today, we’re embarking on an adventure that explores how mental fitness isn’t just about flexing your brain muscles—it’s the key to ascending Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Buckle up, because this journey is packed with practical tips and real-life anecdotes, and a bit of my signature sass to keep things light and lively. The Base Camp: Physiological Needs At the base of Maslow’s pyramid, we have our physiological needs—those fundamental essentials like food, water, and sleep. Think of this as the foundation of your pyramid. Without it, you can’t build anything stable. Tip: Prioritize Your Sleep Sleep is the unsung hero of mental fitness. I remember when I was in grad school and raising kids and I would try to conquer work projects, school assignments, and taking the kids to all the places with a steady diet of B-12 sublingual tablets (I don’t drink coffee.) and 4-hour naps. Spoiler alert: I crashed. Hard. Sure I graduated but afterwards I couldn’t read a book, any book, for like eighteen months. My sleep pattern was wrecked and I felt drained and miserable. After I was able to get back on a regular sleep schedule, my focus improved, I felt more energetic, and I was just more pleasant. I felt like I was living again, not just surviving. Anecdote: Try My “Sleep Like a Hibernating Bear” Experiment To test the impact of sleep on your mental fitness try enforcing a strict 8-hour sleep schedule for a month. It will mean you have to say no to some outings, and be intentional about getting into a good bed time routine. When I was able to do this, it revolutionized my life. Try it if you can. You won’t regret it. The Next Step: Safety Needs Once you’re well-rested and nourished, safety needs come into play. This includes personal security, health, and a stable environment. Mental fitness here means managing stress and ensuring you feel safe and secure. Tip: Create a Safe Space Designate a corner of your home as your relaxation zone. Fill it with things that make you feel safe and happy—a cozy blanket, a favorite book, or a calming essential oil diffuser. Anecdote: The Zen Den I have a tiny nook in my office that is my “Zen Den.” I have a green comfy chair and ottoman, a light blanket, and it right near a window so I get lots of natural light. Whenever life gets overwhelming, I retreat to my Zen Den for a meditation session. It’s my way of hitting the reset button. Social Climbing: Love and Belonging Needs At this level, our focus shifts to relationships and social connections. Feeling loved and part of a community is crucial for our mental well-being. Tip: Schedule Regular Friend Dates Just like you’d schedule a meeting, set regular dates with friends. It could be a weekly coffee catch-up or a monthly game night. The key is consistency. Anecdote: Virtual Dinner Parties I can’t lie, I am not great at this one. But I am working on it. Here is an idea from someone else. During the pandemic, friends started a tradition of virtual dinner parties. Every Friday, they would cook the same recipe and eat together over video call. It was a great way to stay connected and share laughs, even from afar. Put your own twist on this. Self-Esteem and Achievement Now, we’re reaching the esteem needs—recognition, respect, and a sense of accomplishment. Mental fitness here involves building confidence and celebrating your achievements. Tip: Keep a Gratitude Journal Write down three things you’re grateful for every day. It sounds simple, but it shifts your focus to positive experiences and boosts your self-esteem. Anecdote: The Gratitude Jar Start a gratitude jar where you jot down small wins or happy moments on slips of paper. Reading through them at the end of the year will be a powerful reminder of how much you have accomplished and how many wonderful moments you have experienced. Reaching the Summit: Self-Actualization The peak of Maslow’s pyramid is self-actualization—becoming the best version of yourself. This is where mental fitness truly shines, helping you realize your potential and pursue your passions. Tip: Set Personal Goals Identify what you’re passionate about and set small, achievable goals to pursue those interests. Whether it’s learning a new language, writing a novel, or mastering a musical instrument, incremental progress is key. Anecdote: The Guitar Hero My son Aaron always wanted to learn guitar but never took lessons. During a particularly stressful period of his life, he decided to dedicate a few minutes a day to practice. Over time, those few minutes became his passion, and he’s now playing guitar professionally in two bands and feeling more fulfilled than ever. The Climb Continues Remember, climbing Maslow’s pyramid is a continuous journey, not a one-time ascent. Mental fitness is your trusty guide, helping you navigate each level with resilience and joy. So, keep climbing, keep striving, and don’t forget to enjoy the view along the way. Here’s to reaching new heights and becoming the best versions of ourselves—one step at a time! 🏔️ Feel inspired to tackle Maslow’s pyramid with renewed mental fitness? Go for it and share your thoughts, tips, and personal stories in the comments below so that we can cheer you on! Let’s learn from each other and keep climbing together. 🚀 Don’t forget to like and share this content if you find it useful. You can also follow me on Instagram and subscribe to this weekly blog for more on mental fitness.

Last time we talked about the why’s and how’s of mental fitness. Today all I want to talk about is the what. Meaning what exactly can you do to improve your mental fitness. I am only going to share things that I have actually tried and that have worked for me. There are probably tons more, but here is what works for me. By the way today is the perfect day for me to be writing about this, because I am not feeling my best and I have had to do several of the things I list here. Those are some of the things that keep me mentally fit. And no it wasn’t easy, but it was simple. For me the key is to choose what mental fitness I want to include in my daily routine, and make it a part of my regular day. One good trick is to add it to something you already do. E.g. If you have to pick the kids up from school, you can use the time you wait to do an open eye guided meditation. I do a closed eye meditation every morning and every night. I also eat mindfully whenever I eat, so it just becomes a part of what I do daily. What it requires is intention and commitment. I remind myself when I am tempted to skip it, that the breaks I take to do these things help me to be the best version of myself. I am more curious, compassionate and creative when I am my best self. I like me so much better and I am much kinder to everyone else. But the best part is that I see the difference in my sleep, in my body, and I spend way more time in a better mood even on days like today when life is challenging. So, how are you keeping mentally fit? Don’t forget to like, comment, subscribe and follow. I would love to hear from you.

Stress. Trauma. People pleasing. Anxiety. Fear. Procrastination. Overcommitting. The list could go on but I will stop here. Many of us find ourselves managing one or more of these in our lives at one point or another. But what if we could manage them with ease and grace and not let them ruin our health? I am truly afraid for the physical health of the women I see who postpone their self care without a thought. You know who I am talking about, maybe that’s you. Have you ever asked yourself what that postponement costs? According to the CDC, the leading causes of death for women in the US are heart disease, cancer, and stroke. The World Health Organization names heart disease as the leading cause of death for women globally. And I think mental and physical fitness can decrease both of those numbers. But today I only want to focus on mental fitness. What is Mental Fitness? Mental fitness is taking care of our mental well-being and being mindful of our thoughts, actions, and emotions. Just like being physically fit helps us tackle the physical demands of our lives, being mentally fit works in a similar way. It gives us the ability to choose how we react to different situations, whether they’re something we’ve planned for or something unexpected. This helps us to avoid getting hurt emotionally and minimizes our chances of causing harm to ourselves and others. Whether you realize it or not your entire affect changes when you are not in a good space. Think about the last time you were upset with someone or about something. Chances are you thought some not so nice things. Maybe you even said some of them out loud. And based on what you thought or said, it created a reaction that was probably not helpful, whether explicitly or implicitly. And even if no one realized it, it caused a reaction in your body. Sometimes our heart rate speeds up, our muscles tense, our eyes become blurry and our tummy aches. Those are physical responses to a thought pattern. Too many of those physical responses causes harm to our bodies. But when your mind is in good shape, you choose how to handle a mean comment or a disagreement. Being mentally fit gives you the freedom to take a breath and reply the way you prefer, instead of getting all worked up and stressing your body. It’s like having the benefit of hindsight in the present moment. Just think about being less on edge in the countless interactions we go through each week and the benefits to our bodies and minds. Instead of being dysregulated from moment to moment which eventually puts a strain on your body, you control your emotions and reactions which minimizes the stress on your organs so that your physical health is positively impacted. Why is it Important? Our habits determine how we show up each day, and our days are what create our lives so what we do every day in important to our overall wellbeing. Pathways in the brain are like the tracks our thoughts make when they run on repeat. When we do something over and over, the connections between our brain cells shift to make it easier to keep doing that thing. It’s like creating a well-worn path in our minds. They’re like familiar roads that get stronger the more we use them. Like when you take the same route to work every day and can almost do it with your eyes closed. When we keep focusing on the same type of thoughts, we’re essentially reinforcing those thought highways, and our thinking becomes automatic. The thing about automatic thinking is that it can make us react in ways that aren’t really helpful. Our reactions come from automatic thinking based on past feelings or triggers. The good news is that if we want to try something new, we can carve out new paths by doing it regularly, embracing new beliefs, and picturing a great result. How do I do it? One way to work on improving your mental fitness is to maintain your awareness about why you think the way you do. Asking yourself where it comes from so that you act instead of reacting. Ask yourself questions like, What do I really want to happen here? Where do I wanna go? This helps to avoid doing, saying, and thinking negative things without even realizing it, or understanding the impact it has on you and others. Automatic thinking affects all of us, it’s not just you. It originated from our survival brain, the limbic system. It stays vigilant, always looking for potential threats. This wasn’t a problem early in our development, but when we becoming overly focused on threats our automatic thinking becomes attuned to defense which keeps us in a negative head space always ready to fight or escape danger. Imagine how that impacts your heart? The good news is that we can re-program this part of our brain so that our thinking is focused on positive thoughts and behaviors that serve us. It’s like working out for our brains to rewire them to work better for us and improve our lives. That’s what mental fitness training is all about. So what now? My charge to you as you read this is to really start thinking about your mental fitness. How can you create the conditions to increase your positive thinking and emotional regulation? How can you investigate the origins of your thoughts to determine when and how to change them? I will share more on how to increase your mental fitness in next week’s post. In the interim, tell me what you think, subscribe if you like this content, share this with someone who could use it, and follow me on Instagram.